


The First Time

by Gangstertogangster



Category: Luke Cage (TV)
Genre: Declarations Of Love, F/M, Ficlet, Internal Conflict, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-10
Updated: 2021-03-10
Packaged: 2021-03-16 12:22:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29949927
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gangstertogangster/pseuds/Gangstertogangster
Summary: Thinking about love and motivation with these two. I truly think she loves him, she's attracted.But that's not quite how she wants it to go.She doesn’t really know if she even wanted to motivate him with those three words. Or if she ever wanted to say them.
Relationships: Shades Alvarez/Mariah Dillard





	The First Time

The first time was at the height of passion. Just as she got to her third orgasm she dug her fingers into his skin, making him shiver bad. She wrapped her legs around him, got him closer. He leaned in and kissed her softly, desperately. He moved down to her neck, planting kiss after kiss, but really just nestling his head against her. She held his face, whispered seductively, her hot breath right up on his ear, _I love you._

He came hard, nearly burying himself into her. She found herself moaning right along with him. She held him in her arms, he was entirely intoxicated by her. Not long after, he fell asleep. She sat next to him for a bit, her head clearing. 

_I just did it to push him to climax._

Her heart was racing. She had only known him for what, a few months? She wasn’t really attracted to him. He was a fantastic lover, but she wasn’t really attracted to him. That’s what she told herself the next morning, then later, in her office. She was alone, telling herself over a few glasses of vodka.   
  


When he stopped by, as he was prone to do, she gave him plenty of orders, rebuffed his embraces.   
  


“You need to wait,” she said sternly.   
  


He nodded, backed off.   
  


She kept him at a clear and calculated distance. 

She made sure not to say it again when he came over again that night and they made love against the wall of the first floor hallway, then with her right on the dining room table, then up in her bed, she didn’t say anything but _Hernan...Hernan….Hernan…_

Looking into his eyes as she straddled him, she saw his expectant, enraptured expression. He wanted those words again, he was greedy for them and she could tell. She refused, hoping he'd just finish and fall asleep or better yet, leave. 

When he held her afterwards he opened his mouth to say something but changed his mind.

Right then and there she pushed him away. 

“I want my bed to myself tonight”, she snapped. 

He looked at her, confused. He asked, softly, “Why?”

She glared at him, swiftly replied, “I need my space. And you have your own place.” 

He nodded. He kissed her, cupping her face in his hand. She watched him use the bathroom to clean off, get dressed, and leave. 

“See you tomorrow,” he said flatly. 

“Yeah, sure,” was her response. 

She went to sleep, relishing and regretting all the room. 

He was getting too used to staying over, for a man with his own bed and his own place. But the fact of the matter was she was getting too used to him as well.   
  


To punish the both of them for this fact, she took sex off the table for the next week. 

Next time they had each other, Mariah whispered, “Do you love me…”

He looked perplexed for a brief second but he looked at her so tenderly after that and moaned, “Yes…” 

“I wanna hear it from you,” she informed him, digging her nails into his back. 

“ _I love you…_ ” he moaned as she held his body closer to hers. He climaxed instantly. She stroked the back of his neck, smirking as he trembled. 

_Now, he was the one left vulnerable_. 

She held him in her arms as they slept, but occasionally she’d wake, left with questions herself. 

_I just wanted him to say it to prove it means jack shit._

_I don’t love him._

_It’s just control, that’s all he wants and all I want,_ she thought to herself as she drifted back to sleep. 

Neither would say the phrase to the other again for a good while.


End file.
